We've all heard the word "sis" being used more so in the black community as a form endearment. In 2017, it's been used as a form of shade. Why? I would like to know the answer myself. If it used to be a form of endearment why make it negative? This has been on my mind for a while because for a long time everything positive has been turned around to mean the wrong thing or give the wrong impression.
For example, you see something you don't like on social media or someone said something you don't like and you comment, "Come on sis". First of all, why are they a "sis"? Because if it was something you didn't see your like, it was negative and you sat there to comment negatively. Because I see this so much from the black community, why can't we just use the word as a form of helping or being positive when saying "sis". There are enough reality shows putting us down. We fight each other, talk about each other and show too much of ourselves to prove a point no one cares about. If we're showing the world we can't get along then we're showing ourselves we can't.
Speaking of shade, why does it have to constantly be thrown amongst black women. Not that white women don't throw shade, but white women run in packs. I see a lot of it because of where I work. I seldom see black women in packs unelss they've known these people for years but we always fall out over little things which comes from shade. If we want to speak up about something, it should be done without putting the other person down. Trying to go below the belt about someone else's problems is not cool at all. What do their problems have to do with that you want to talk about? If you have something to say, say it and move on. We need to get along better because we are all we have and if we can't we'll always be against one another.
Be a good "sis" and leave the shade to the trees. Cut that shit out and love one another!
The internet is really shameful when it comes to judging people because it gets taken way too far. The comments, the memes, and the posts are really degrading and people don't realize how much it can kill someone's pride or self esteem. Self esteem is very important because we aren't taught too much as to how to love ourselves but more how to point out what's wrong. If we don't love ourselves we will think low of ourselves and feel as if we don't have anything to offer. That's not the case at all. To be real, we all have insecurities but how we make them beautiful is what counts the most.
I had to say something about this because first of all, the girl in this picture is posing for prom and looks really happy. Also she looks so beautiful and the dress is so amazing. Then here goes someone out of the blue commenting on her to put her down. Why? Remember, people who have so much to say about others or comment on someone's situation isn't happy with what they have going on. That's life but they have to deal with that on their own. We can't change a person but in a way we can change how they think as far as other people.
When it comes to body shaming there are so many ads, pages on social media and magazines we see with women or men that have this "perfect body". We all come in different shapes and sizes but who's to say that that isn't perfect. I'm not saying it's not okay to be in shape because that's perfectly fine. Also you can maintain your weight but just because someone else doesn't approve doesn't mean you have to change yourself to please them. Body shaming is NOT allowed. Men or women should be able love who they are without being judged. Short, tall, skinny, buff and etc. You name it!
Be comfortable with who you are and if you want to change for the better, that's YOUR'E decision!
Where I'm from (Philadelphia) there's seems to be a trend of supporting people that are hot instead of the ones who are upcoming or trying. My whole thing is this is the city of Brotherly Love, why can't we show one another love? Why can't we support each other? Why is that when we do show love it's considered "dickeating"? There's no justification as to why we do it yet it still keeps happening. I think it's a shame that you have to have the hottest video doing something stupid or a certain amount of followers to be considered somebody.
Attention is a gift and a curse. Some people get attention for the right reasons while others get attention because of what the world thinks is okay. The shit that we see everyday that causes people to lose their respect is not thorough. As we say in Philly, "thurl". Social media has gotten people stuck on this habit to believe a life that's fake, to believe it's okay to degrade yourself and to believe it's okay to trade respect for attention. I thought being popular was something but it's not if it isn't for something good. By the grace of God people know who I am for my message and I only have 572 followers. I refuse to sell my soul for 15 minutes of fame.
If there is anythjng you want to do in this life, never feel like you have to degrade yourself to fit the picture. If you feel that whatever someone offers you or if you have to stoop down to that level, that situation or thing is NOT for you. As Lauryn Hill said, "Respect is just the minimum". How are you gaining your respect? What are you doing to be noticed that bad? Don't let this world consume you of shit that you wouldn't want your kids or let alone your parents to see. When it comes to good things support it. Why support dumb shit and join the wave? To follow other followers? The new wave is doing things for popularity instead of success. Now, it's killing the youth. We have to do better! Don't let this world pimp you!
I recently read about two young adults who committed suicide. One of them was found in her dorm and the other I know nothing of as to where he was found. The two were a couple and there were a lot of great things that people had to say of them. On the other hand, there is a video going around of the boyfriend crying over his girlfriend taking her life. Another report also says he wrote a letter and from there he took his own life to be with her.
First and foremost, this story is tragic and no one should have to go through that. We never know what someone is going through. The girlfriend was pregnant and her family didn't support the decision but her boyfriend was willing to be there for her. By putting two and two together this situation may have been the trigger of her emotions. Reading about this broke my heart and people will truly do anything for love. To know that these two took their own lives leaving two families is saddening. Because we don't know what people are going through we have to let people, as they say, "be great". Sometimes people act out, say certain things or stay to themselves as a cry for help or attention.
There are so many triggers around us that cause us to feel up or down. When we're at our lowest a lot of thoughts go through our heads and we end up not knowing what to do. Sometimes we may feel like the easy way out is to take ourselves out. If anybody you know is going through something, the best thing to do is just listen and not voice too much of an opinion. An opinion comes off as judgment. A person who has enough going on in their life doesn't need that.
For those who are going through ANYTHING and feel like they have no one to talk to, call this number below 👇🏾
Don't take your life no matter what the situation is. Your life is valuable!
I dont know if any of you know this movie called "Jungle Fever" but it was based on a black man dating an Italian woman and how it wasn't accepted from any of their races. Well at least that's the message I picked up from it. The black man was looked at differently from the people around him first because he cheated on his wife with this Italian woman and the fact that she Italian. In other words white. When the Italian women's friends found out they were in shock because of how others would feel. When her father found out he got violent with her.
Now I have a question, what if the roles were reversed? What if the woman was black and the man was white. For example Serena Williams. Everybody's happy for her, she's engaged and now she's pregnant. That's fine right? Why does a black man get bashed for dating a white woman and having his opinion as to why he does date white women. Don't get me wrong, there are black men who are brainwashed, thinking that white women are more superior than black women. There are others who would rather date white women. We even applaud white men for dating black women. For a black man to date a white woman, we're looking at him like "What is he doing with her?".
To me, love is love and has no gender or color. People love who they love or like what they like. For me I would rather date within my race because I love my people. Not that I don't love or like white people. They're cool too but I'm a black woman and I love where I come from. My point in pointing out these comparisons is to ask, you don't think Serena could be putting herself in the sunken place? You don't think any black woman could be white-washed in a way? Why do we tell black women, "Get rid of Tyrone and get you a Bobby?". Then that looks like we're bashing black men. Let's ask ourselves, what's really going on here?
Feel free to comment!
I'm not sure if any of you are familiar with this but, "Hypermasculinity is a psychological term for the exaggeration of male stereotypical behavior, such as an emphasis on physical strength, aggression, and sexuality." (Wikipedia). If a gay man is gay he should be able to express himself in that matter without being treated like he's less of a man. Straight men are entitled to their opinion and have the right to feel how they feel BUT shouldn't be disrespectful while doing so.
Personally, I'm here for the black boys in crop tops while wearing flowers. Straight men have been wearing crops tops before I was thought of. I know this for a fact because the first man I saw ever to wear one was Will Smith on an episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air . I thought he looked cute and sexy, just to throw that in there. Look below 👇🏾
Many people across the globe are familiar with these people and are big fans of them. Regardless of that, expressionism shouldn't be looked down upon. Expressionism should be embraced because there are so many people dealing with who they want to be, are trying to be or growing to be. In a world with so many look alikes and being judged for stupid shit, it's hard for those people. The comment in the first picture startled me and I'm certain a man said this. Why as a man are you worried about what another man is doing and why he's doing it? That's where you have to check yourself because you're too concerned. If that's the case, internally you're battling insecurities that you haven't faced yet.
To any black man, it's okay to be expressive. You shouldn't have to hide who you are or fake being "tough". Bring down the "hype" just a notch. Being a man of love for himself never hurts, it helps you flourish.
Yesterday I had the pleasure of meeting Maleek Jackson. I have to say I've heard a lot great things about this young man. From being in jail to transitioning into a better man to help others is what we all need in this world especially in the city of Philadelphia. I also got the chance to purchase his new book and get it signed by him and his beautiful girlfriend Raelia Lewis. She also has a book that she wrote herself. Her book is entitled "Trust Your Journey".
Though I couldn't stay long, for how long I did stay, I enjoyed myself and happy that I came out to the book release. If you haven't heard of Maleek or Raelia, you can follow them on Instagram at @maleek_jackson and @raelialewis to check out the great things that they do for the community.
If you missed the chance to purchase the book, follow Maleek or Raelia!
Yup! Yes I did stop what I was going to do when I got in just to listen to this album. I wanted something to talk about and this album is the talk of the world, the town, etc. You name it!!! I mean Kendrick Lamar is a real one. He always has something to talk about with substance, meaning, something to think and talk about. We were just talking about Drake. No shade Drake, you're my guy! On the other hand, nobody can't tell me that Kendrick didn't just kill this shit fam! Like, Zoe just gave us so more heat again? He couldn't just leave us with Humble, right?
I love, love, love the album! I would say what my favorite song is but each song was hot! I love how he capitalized each name of the song. I feel like that puts more emphasis about what Kendrick is talking about. After each song, you're going to want to hear more. I promise you. I also loved how he added the scripture verses in his songs with his dad talking to him. That was more of a personal touch we needed. Everything he said was thought provoking. As much as say we love God, we need to include Him more in our lives (yea me too). Speaking of which, I'm happy to see that a black man isn't afraid to express who he is as a man through any aspect of his life such as religion. Religion is a topic that is very touchy and often talked about.
Aside from that, Kendrick has another message for us all through different realms of life and I think you (yes YOU reading this) should take the time out and listen to each song!!! Search "Damn" in iTunes!!! Thank me later!
I don't mean this in a literal sense but a lot of the time in our lives we settle. We settle for things because it's there and it's something to do. We don't really look at the value of something and think about how it can benefit us. Why? We don't take the time to really appreciate it or really get to know what it's for. We have to know when things are and aren't for us. This life is not meant for us to have all of the answers. We have to know the answer to some situations by going through them. We try to get over things not realizing that forcing some things can't overcome a situation. That's beside the point, this is about not settling.
From our job, relationship, friends and current situation, we think, "This may be it" or "This is want God wants". You ever thought God wants YOU to realize that you are better than your current situation? Think about when He created you or just a creation in general. When you create something and you know you can do better, you step back from the product to see what you can change, keep or if it's worth starting over to create something totally different. What happens in our lives doesn't mean it's the final destination. Just like a college graduate (hint, hint lol). Our parents, family and friends tell us so much "I'm proud of you" but we know deep down inside we can do so much better alongside the other accomplishments we've already made.
Ask yourself, do you want to be just a happy meal or a soul food meal? I know I don't want anybody to look at me like I'm just anything. Though, it's not about how others perceive you, people won't take you serious if you look at yourself as anything. You can't settle when it comes to who you want to be or who you strive to be because settling leads to being comfortable. There's always room to be better and to grow. Be that full course meal not just a happy meal.
Last night I went on a rant about how social media has basically given us lost connection with ourselves and the people around us. Back then life was so much easier because of less distractions. Also the constant comparisons. We could be around other people and know who they are by just being around them or having a conversation with them. What I find amazing is that one single device with so many social networks, we have been so conditioned to believe everything through face value through social media. Social media isn't about connecting it's about bragging these days.
People look at what you have as far a relationship, money, possessions and etc. to determine your true status of who are and how you live. There's nothing wrong with being blessed but not every blessing or everything you do is meant for the world to know. Don't get me wrong I've been this person and some thing I've learned is to keep things strictly business. Once you show a different side people will judge you. Honestly it doesn't matter what you're doing, someone will always have something to say. That's the next problem, as soon as something is posted or something said, a trend is created and now the world has been distracted by this one thing. There's way too much going on to worry about shit that won't even matter when this life is over.
There are many people who brag about being petty, being a savage, being lowkey and being this or that. Why though? What do you have to prove and who you trying m to prove yourself to? The real copy is the best copy. Why get alternative facts when you could just get the facts right? So why creative a different copy when you can give the original? Whoever is behind these social medias don't know any of us. Always be proud of growing but being dysfunctional is nothing to be find happiness in. It's also nothing to brag about. Don't let social media make you a victim of unhappiness. That's not life.
My name is Kennedie. I am a young woman still learning the ways of the world and how to manage. I am currently pursuing a degree in Mass Media. My purpose in creating my blog is to inspire others and to share as well as receive different points of view.